Keeping Marriage Couple-Centered | Sean Grover | #89

Jun 10

Licensed Clinical Social Worker and psychotherapist Sean Grover discusses with Dr. Liz Hale the challenges of maintaining a couple-centered marriage amidst the demands of parenting. Grover, an expert with over 25 years of experience, shares insights from his books and provides practical tips for preventing parent burnout. The episode emphasizes the importance of self-care, creativity, and effective communication in strengthening marital bonds and fostering a happier family life.

Chapters:

0:00 – Introduction to today’s podcast
01:12 - Dr. Liz welcomes Sean Grover and introduces the topic of child-centered marriages versus couple-centered marriages.
02:04 - Sean talks about his book "When Kids Call the Shots" and the dynamics of children taking over parenting roles.
02:23 - Parents creating "monsters" in their children.
03:11 - Importance of children testing limits and the role of defiance in their development.
04:06 - Negative impact of children disrespecting parents and the need for healthy boundaries.
04:37 - Sean shares his personal experience with parent burnout and how it led him to reassess his life and parenting style.
05:27 - The toll of parenting on personal health and marital relationships.
06:21 - Importance of communication with one's partner and the need for self-care to combat burnout.
08:09 - The significance of making time for oneself and pursuing creative activities.
09:42 - Taking better care of oneself leads to improved relationships with children and partners.
12:30 - How to establish that bullying behavior in children will not be tolerated.
13:48 - Benefits of therapy and couples counseling in reclaiming a marriage.
16:43 – The profound impact of a child's perception of their parents' relationship on their well-being.
17:13 - Practical burnout prevention tips.
17:29 – Sean's burnout prevention checklist: self-care, creativity, exercise, personal adventures, and social connections.
24:21 – Do not be ashamed of feeling burnt out, it's never too late to make positive changes.
26:46 – Sean's key to a stronger marriage connection.
28:44 – Sean's takeaway of the day.
29:43- Liz's takeaway of the day.

Insights:

Sean: Don't give up. It's never too late to start again. You can retrain your brain, even after years of chronic illness. I was reading about people who overcame 22 years of illness by retraining their minds. I have a young patient with an incurable intestinal disease who has been symptom and medication-free for two years now. Remember, people are more adaptable than we think. You can challenge and change behaviors and rewire your brain. So, don't give up.
Liz: Your happiness as a parent is so important to your child. It's everything. When you, as a parent, genuinely enjoy parenting your child, it sends positive messages that you might not even realize. Even if you're a newlywed or haven't had children yet, it's never too early to focus on what kind of parent you want to be. Think about what you want to embrace and how you want to show up in the world of parenting.

About Sean Grover:

Sean Grover is a psychotherapist and best-selling author with over 25 years of experience. Sean has appeared on the Today Show and over 200 podcasts and radio shows, and leads one of the largest group therapy practices in the United States.

Sean’s Burnout Prevention Checklist: