Tips For Potty Training
If you’re a parent, it probably won’t surprise you that when babies are born, they can’t control their bladders or bowel movements, right? In fact, until they’re about nine months old, filling their diapers is a reflex! Thank goodness this changes over time, of course. Their bladders get bigger, so they don’t need to empty as often, and then between 18 months and two years of age, their brains connect with specific nerves and their bladder muscles, which sets the stage for... potty training!
It probably doesn’t take long for you to be SO ready for your little one to be out of diapers, so this might be something you’ve looked forward to. At the same time, it can also definitely be a FRUSTRATING and MESSY part of parenting –literally and figuratively! There are going to be ups and downs, and probably a WEE bit of stress for both parent and child.
Here are some tips that can help the process go as smoothly as possible:
NOTICE and ENCOURAGE interest in learning to use the toilet. Kiddos probably won’t have the muscle control and interest they need to potty train until they’re about two or two and a half–and some even longer, each child is different! So you may be eager to have them out of diapers, but it doesn’t do any good to push them if they’re not ready! Instead, keep an eye out for signals that they might be curious about and open to trying to use the toilet.
Maybe they ask to sit on the toilet or don’t like the feeling of a wet or messy diaper. Let them ease into the idea and support their interest in learning by doing things like reading them picture books about going potty and answering their questions about it!
They also need to be ready in other ways, like being able to follow simple instructions, being able to take their pants on and off, and wanting to be independent. They need to be physically, behaviorally, and mentally ready, and again, every kiddo’s timeline for that is different!
Be patient. Remember, using the toilet is new for them! And there’s a lot that goes into this “stinky” process. Learning to recognize when they need to go to the bathroom takes time, and they need to develop control of their bowel and bladder muscles. Also, when they get involved in playing, they either forget about all of that and don’t even notice when they need to go, or, if they do notice, it’s hard to leave their game! Toys area lot more fun than the toilet—go figure!
Fair warning now, it’s going to be hard to be patient when your child has an accident or doesn’t want to use the toilet. You might be tempted to yell, leave them in a dirty diaper, or try to force them to use the toilet. But those kinds of tactics tend to backfire. They just make them feel bad and will make it even harder to get them to be open to potty-training! Plus, it frustrates the heck out of you as the parent, right?
Notice when they need to go to the bathroom. It’s easy to get busy and distracted. You have a lot to do! But kiddos need your help to recognize and understand their body signals, and then to go through the steps of using the toilet. So make sure to stop what you’re doing every once in a while to check in with your child. Pay attention to their cues: Are they swaying from side to side in a little “dance” or crouched in a corner? Ask them if they need to go often, but without nagging. (The sweet spot is being right about half of the time.)
Remember, this is new to them, and they might not notice they need to go until...Oh crap, it’s too late!
Help your kiddos feel safe and loved. This matters to them more than anything! And it can play a big part in helping them figure out potty training. Maybe you can read them stories or talk to them while they’re on the toilet, or you can get creative and make going potty a fun adventure with a potty chart and stickers! Try to stay calm and supportive–and even try to see it as an opportunity to bond with your child!
Think ahead about your kiddos’ clothing. For example, having them wear cloth under pants can help them notice better than pull-ups when they’ve had an accident. Dressing them in clothes they can easily get on and off is also a good idea. And when you leave the house, make sure to bring lots of back-up clothing in case of an accident! Which is bound to happen...
There you have it, the five tips for potty training: one, notice and encourage your kiddos’ interest in the toilet rather than trying to force it on them; two, be patient and look at things from their perspective; three, notice when your little one needs to use the toilet; four, help them feel safe and loved; and five, be smart about your child’s clothing!
Remember, temporary setbacks are TOTALLY normal during potty training. For the most part, kiddos can get pretty good at using the toilet by the time they’re about three, three and a half, although it’s not uncommon to still have accidents until at least kindergarten. Accidents don’t mean you’ve done anything wrong or that your child isn’t going to get this potty thing down. Keep trying, get creative when needed, and always let your child know how much you love them, and it’ll work out!
I do want to share a great book that works for many parents (including us) who are about to start potty-training. It’s called Potty Training in 3 Days. And I’ll post a link in the comments or description.
I hope this has been helpful, please take two seconds and give it a like, share it, and leave a comment about what you have found helpful in the potty-training process!