Enjoying Life With Children
It’s been said that “love” can really be spelled “T-I-M-E.” And, it turns out, research shows that there’s truth to that, especially when it comes to parents and their young children!
You may recall me talking in other videos about the 3 needs -all human beings, especially children, have three essential needs for surviving and thriving in this life, and it’s up to YOU (and others) to help meet these needs. They are Safety (physical and emotional safety), Satisfaction, and Connection. So today we’re talking about meeting the need for attachment and connection, because children are so much more open to your teaching and correction when they like you!
Bringing a child into your family is a huge deal! It might seem like having that little one turns your whole world upside down. But just think about this: to your child, you ARE the world! They rely completely on you to meet not only their physical needs but also to help them learn and feel loved. Again, it’s your job to help meet their basic needs for Safety, Satisfaction, and Social Connection.
That’s a lot to take on, but here are three tips that can help you help that little one thrive:
Organize Your Life Around Your Child. The way you spend your time and how you plan and make choices may need to shift so that you can take care of your little one. That may include things like getting up during the night to comfort them if they’re scared or lonely and planning and preparing meals that will help them be healthy.
Remember this, children thrive with predictability, stability, and routine. They love knowing what comes next (as adults, we do best with predictability, stability, and routine as well).
Keep Learning Together. Giving your child toys to play with and taking them to new places helps them learn to use their hands and feet and to get to know this great big world! And they’re not the only ones who can be learning as they grow. Learning from books (or videos like this!) and other caring adults can help you learn how to be the best parent you can be. I’ll be sharing some of my all time Dave’s Faves books in many of these videos so stay tuned for those.
My favorite tip is to Celebrate Your Child’s Progress and enjoy the little things. Pay attention as your child develops skills with moving and speaking and interacting with other people. They’ll go from making noises to saying words and sentences, to telling stories –and telling you they love you.
Notice their progress and enjoy every step forward! This can look like cheering as they start to ride a bike on their own, listening with patience and encouragement as they learn to express how they are feeling, or putting a picture they drew on the fridge to celebrate their budding artistic skills.
One last thought with this: To do your best with this tip, you need to practice “Unplugging” to engage and really connect with your child. This can definitely be tough, especially if your child is stressing you out. But when your child can’t get your attention, they might feel lonely, rejected, and frustrated and have a harder time managing their emotions, which will only make things more stressful. So try to put the screens away and really be with your child when you’re together! This will help you be better able to notice and enjoy the little moments with them.
This is an amazing thing you get to be a part of: the miracle of their development! Play, read, and laugh together. Take lots of pictures as they grow up and write down their most important experiences–including the moments that just make you smile. You may look back and realize it was the little things that really meant the most. Don’t take this time together for granted!
Okay, let’s be honest, being a parent is not easy. It’s a ton of work. Sometimes your kiddo’s needs will get in the way of your “wants.” Sometimes their behavior can be challenging. But investing time with them–and how you invest that time –makes a huge difference. The quantity and the quality of that time matters!
So remember the three tips:
Organize your life to take care of your little one,
Keep learning together.
Celebrate your child’s progress and enjoy the little things.
Please take a moment to like, comment, and share this video and blog post with other parents who you know would benefit from these tips.